The Letter He Never Sent

I found this letter tucked inside Edward's journal. He wrote it a month before he told me about his brain tumor. I was going to share the real last letter he gave me with his will but I think I'll keep that one just for me.

Dear K-

I wish with all my heart that we met under different circumstances. It wasn't my intention to add to your heartaches; on the contrary, I was hoping to be the answer to all your prayers.

I know it's been tough for you and the kids, having to go through that abandonment. When you finally opened up to me, I swore I would be there for all of you. So when I found out I'm sick again, I was devastated.

This is a mistake, I know. To leave you and the children with no explanation is a shattering blow, but you will get over this quickly. I will be just another guy who let you down.

I'm so sorry for leaving you - it wasn't easy for me. With all that you've already been through, I wouldn't be able to endure watching you suffer while I get worse. I know you well enough to be certain you would stay by my side until the end. But the loss - it will take another piece of your soul, a piece you can't afford to lose.

I love you with all my heart. I wish I was the children's father - they are just as precious to me as you are. You will be in my thoughts until I can no longer dream. Thank you for loving me and for giving me a glimpse of what life would have been for me.

So this is countdown 5, 4, 3... two more stories to go and I'll be done. Wow!